After 2013 (which is a story of its own) I have a
hard time trusting people. It is a lot easier to shut people out and be rude
and afterwards apologise than being polite and giving a person the benefit of
the doubt. Especially strangers.
It’s been nine months since 2013 – it should be the
birth of a new era. And I have decided to give people the benefit of the doubt.
Not in all cases. If there is even an inkling of doubt with someone’s
intentions I walk (run, actually!) away. But I have decided in the very least
to give my co-workers and family the benefit of the doubt. To just “be nice”
and assume that their intentions are good and that they are also nice. (It
sounds strange to not even trust your loved ones, but doubt has a sickening way
of infiltrating even our most basic relationships.)
And with that…the very harsh realisation that I have
not been giving God the benefit of the doubt. I have been expecting the worst
around every corner. I’ve had faith in His existence, but not in His Good
Nature. If ANYONE is PURE and ONLY good it’s Him! Even more than my best attempt at
being a Samaritan, His ACTS (not merely His intentions) are out of love for us
and unquestionable. And He cares – right down to the last detail. He has
proven it over and over and over again. Why do I still expect only the worst
in every scenario?
I’m sorry God for not always giving you the benefit
of the doubt.
You deserve more – You deserve my undivided faith.
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